[Touchy subject warning - Don't flame me]
I was recently asked by a female friend if men like "self-confident women"
Here was my off-the-top-of-my-head answer:
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The stereotype of "Men" is that they don't like over-confident/bossy/opinionated women.
I think it's more complicated than that. There are a number of things to keep in mind.
1. Often times, men like to feel needed, protective and in control of their lives.
2. Men and women who consider themselves 'self-confident' often confuse that with being loud, confrontational and always think they're right.
3. This often works for most men because the world is full of ugly double standards and men are 'supposed' to act that way. As Sheryl Sandberg says, when a man is assertive or loud he is said to have 'leadership skills' while a woman can be called 'bossy'.
4. I don't think that being "loud, confrontational and always thinking you're right" is actually self confidence for EITHER sex, though. I think that knowing when to listen, speak softly, ask the right questions and understand your own internal strength is a true form of confidence. I find the other thing an obnoxious turn off irrespective who it's coming from.
So my answer to the question is, figure out if you are REALLY self-confident or just opinionated and not giving a man (and other people) the space to be who they need to be. Because if you have true self confidence the way I described it in point 4, I don't think most men would have a problem with that.