Whenever two or more people collaborate, differences of opinion and perspective will always happen. We each see the world from our own particular vantage point. Often that’s the very point of the collaboration!

For this reason, being able to have good arguments with your cofounder, peers and/or significant other is a priceless superpower that can be the difference between failure, mediocrity or a raging success.

So when you inevitably argue...

Be careful of repeating the same arguments and patterns over and over again.

Try to avoid recrimination (you meant to hurt me!), exaggeration (fine! Then I’ll never complain again), straw man arguments (you just want me to do whatever you say), martyrdom (ok, fine, you’re always right) and other patterns that undermine a constructive argument.

Try to listen, use “I feel” instead of “you always...” and keep your eye on the true goal of any debate:

To form a new, true, durable consensus based on a deeper understanding of the world from multiple perspectives.